CHIN UP!

Anyone who know me can attest to the fact that when my home is organized, I am a much happier person. Though, since moving to San Francisco, I've been poorer than ever. But as I've told my friends (and continue to tell myself), I'd rather be poor in an awesome city than go out every night (like I was in Richmond, VA) in a mediocre one.

Shortly after moving into my apartment, I was lucky enough to find the exact shel I wanted from IKEA for free (FREE!) on Craigslist. Fortunately for me, I have an overly polite and considerate roommate with a station wagon who drove me across town to pick it up. The stupid thing fit perfectly into the back of his wagon. Since then I've been keeping my eye on Craigslist for the same shelf, though not necessarily for free - just you know, cheapish.

That hasn't happened and I haven't bought a second one because for the first time in my life I'm only spending money on food and transportation. I don't go out much, except recently on OkCupid dates where I silently pray to myself that he will pick up the check because I really need to buy bread tomorrow. (Aside: I don't agree to go on dates if I can't afford them. I always offer to pay for myself.)

I've been on break for about three weeks and classes start next week and I've had this pile of stuff on the floor in my room for three months. I hate it. But I haven't known what to do with it because I haven't had anywhere to put it. I've just kept it all in old department store bags the former tenant left behind.

But last night after my attempt to get all the girls in my quarter together fell through, I decided to treat myself to a movie. I only did this because I knew that if a certain dude was working he would give me a discount. AMC doesn't offer student or military discounts here, but if you ask him, and show him your ID, he'll let you in at the children's rate. Four bucks a pop adds up. Yay! Bread!

On my walk home I found a shelf in the middle of my block. It wasn't next to any trash bins, and it kind of looked like it might have been meant for someone else to pick up, or like someone may have been in the process of taking things inside and that was the last one. I loitered for a bit to see, but no one was around, so I took it home. It's also from IKEA and in the same veneer as my other shelf.

It may seem silly, but I haven't been so grateful, or happy about anything in awhile. These little things are so huge to me. And, I mean, it was so random, and it matched.

The previous night I was crying to my friend on the phone and he told me, "Chin up, kid." And then the Universe did something nice and was all, "CHIN UP. CHIN UP. CHIN UP."

Fuck America's Financial Student Assitance

So, last semester I was able to pay for everything, no problem. Then this semester happened and work was slow, and I did not make as much money as I was hoping to. So, what's a girl to do? She fills out a billion forms on FAFSA and then wait for them to get processed and then get told that my dad hasn't electronically cosigned after waiting the ten days. So then I call him and tell him he didn't sign and he didn't relize he didn't do that. Then I go to the financial aid office every two days to see if it's processed. Finally I get to see a financial aid counselor who tells me I need to call FAFSA. So I do that and they tell me that my dad has STILL NOT COSIGNED. And then I get really angry because I think that he forgot. But he didn't and he got a confirmation number the first time, but he signs with his pin number again. I call FAFSA again and they say that it went through this time. Which is great, but it should have gone through over a week ago and now I have to wait another week and all the old ladies at the financial aid office keep giving me shit about waiting so long, BUT IT'S NOT MY FAULT! THIS ALL SHOULD HAVE PROCESSED AND I SHOULD HAVE HAD MY MONEY OVER A WEEK AGO! And now because it's taken so long, I might not get anything, and I missed my last bio quiz because I was dealing with all of this and thought that it closed tomorrow at noon and not today at noon.

This semester has been way worse than last semester academically, and not because I have a huge balance in my account I can't even register for classes for the fall. I may have to go to the community college for a semester to chill out and let everything get sorted out at VCU. Ugh, I am so not feeling it. Actually with the way things are going I probably won't be able to do that right now either, and I'm probably not going to get to Europe unless I somehow start making more money. I am picking up more hours in a couple weeks, and hopefully people will need wall paper removed?

At least Richmond is cheap. And I think this is what rock bottom is supposed to feel like, but I"m nineteen and while I know you're supposed to be poor in college, but really? I can't help feel left out of the loop when my best friend is studying abroad in Paris and another's parents pay for their school, and spring-break trip to Montreal and will be paying for them to go to beach week, and another who goes to school in New York City and doesn't work...I mean my parents to do help me out, but it's help, it's not everything, and I resent the fact that they help me out at all.

I wish I could be content going to school and not having a life outside of it, but I'm not, so this summer I'm going to try and at least be content in Richmond.

waiting for may

I am missing the Crystal Stilts/Comet Gain show right now. I am attempting to spend less time in DC and you know, am really low on funds. This whole being a poor-college-student thing is not working out for me.

I drove around all day on an empty tank, thankfully "all day" means no more than ten miles, so after work I finally filled up. The dudes in front of me had their bass turned all the way up. Really? At the gas station? When you're car isn't even moving? Douchebags. I hate that. In response to their obnoxious behavior, I decided to be equally obnoxious and blast The Long Blondes, if for no other reason than to drown them out.

When I turned around there was a homeless man who popped up out of no where who was complementing my music and of course asking for money. I awkwardly told him that I didn't have any change, and I didn't. I very rarely carry anything besides my debit card, and besides he approached me and that was a little nerve-racking.

Also nerve-racking (I'm pretty sure I'm spelling that wrong, sorry) is the end of this semester. It's going horribly. I just want it to be over and for it to be May already. And I want to know where I'm going to be living and I wantwantwant. I think I'm going to spend the first two weeks after I move in free of electronics, well at least no internet or outgoing calls and texts and just work on the apartment.

I've spent a couple days this week helping my sister take down wall-paper in her new house and just being there gets me excited about painting and decorating my place. As of right now, RIGHT NOW! I will be inheriting a bunch of stuff from my parents including, but not limited to: one coffee table, three matching book shelves, pots and pans, glasses, another "kidney" shaped table, a bed and dresser - all of it is at least thirty years old, except for maybe the kitchen stuff. This is in addition to the monkey chair and my desk and this really awesome lamp/pyramid table that I got from someone my mom cleans for. This is enough furniture form y bedroom and the living room. We really only need a kitchen table, a couch and an entertainment center cabinet thing (though there is one at Diversity thrift that I reallyreallyreally want). Dear GOD! I am so excited about this. And I'll have framed pictures on walls that I will have painted and my flower menorah, and then I'll have pictures to prove how awesome my apartment will be (that is way better than everyone elses).