Dating. It sucks. Mostly because V-day is like a week away and I have never had a decent one. Last year Mraco was still in Georgia and we had to wait to celebrate until he came to visit like a week later. And that still didn't turn out the way it should, or dates should - but that was just because he didn't have a car (Army) and didn't live here.
So, because I have been very frustrated with the boys in Richmond not doing things the right way, I've decided to make a list. DC boys, you did it right, and perhaps set the bar too high for these guys down here.
- I am a lady, or at least should be treated like one. I shouldn't have to ask for it. You are a boy and you should just do it, no matter our status.
- Open my door.
- Stand up when I come to and leave the table.
- Excuse yourself when you need to use your phone, whether or not you leave my presence. It's polite.
- Always offer to pay. It doesn't matter if I am dating you or not. It's called being a gentleman.
- An amendment to the above - because we are out and you are offering to pay, do no wait to pick up the bill. Pick it up immediately. Do not let me see it. But do wait for me to offer to pay my half and then insist on paying all of it. I don't mind covering the tip or treating us to dessert afterward.
- Pick me up.
- Bring me flowers. This is probably the only thing that other girls can dispute. Some people don't like flowers - those people are obviously incompetent. I love fresh flowers, all of them, except carnations and mums. Buy me those and I will never talk to your cheap ass again.
- Dance with me. At least know how to waltz. Dancedancedance. I want to dance, with you.
- Plan something, anything, a walk, take me to a park and push me on a swing, seriously, this isn't difficult.
- Though sometimes I should get giddy. I love the pre-date giddiness.
- I like to look pretty, you should too. I want to get dressed up sometimes, and I want to see you in a tie, and if you really want to impress me, wear french cuffs, with cuff links, without pleated pants.
All of this may make me seem "high maintenance" but really it's just traditional. I like my independence just as much as you do, but if you think I'm cute, time rewinds to 1926. And these things aren't all romantic, they're just common courtesy.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Being taken over by the fear
Lily Allen doesn't have the best reputation in the music industry. She's a bit "edgy" if you will. I didn't like her first album and didn't understand the fuss. I get annoyed when I see her featured in the tabloids, and I couldn't care less about her upbringing (she poses as a rags to riches story when she's had riches all along...). BUT! Then she came out with the single The Fear and I can't stop listening to it. And now she's put up her entire sophomore album on her myspace page, and I'll tell you what it is the cure to her first album. It's arrogant, snarky, sweet and all wrapped in heaps of bubblegum. Even the song Fuck You (you being George Bush in this instance) sounds sweet. She has found a balance of contrast between her lyrics and accompaniment. I'm not going to say that she doesn't get on my nerves anymore, because she does, but I wouldn't be surprised if this album hit number one it's first week out, at least in the UK, it's that good.
For those of you that aren't going to hop to it and give it a listen, I'll give you the abridged version.
1. Everyone's at it - she questions why our generation is so quick to turn to medication and drugs over constructive vices.
2. The Fear - her i'm-not-sure-if-i-love-or-hate-fame song; the lines "I don't know what's right and what's real, anymore" and "life's more about film stars and less about mothers" lead any listener to question if she's sure about where her life is headed. Love it.
3. Not fair - simply about a nice boy who can't give her an orgasm. Sucks for her, possibly more for him, but hilarious nonetheless.
4. 22 - she pities a woman who's "nearly thirty" and who's "life is nearly over" all because society says so. I'm going to have to agree, I don't think anyone's life really starts until they are 22, and unfortunately being a woman, society does seem to say that we're not worth much after thirty, it's a shame really because I know some really cool ladies that are 30+. I don't agree with the sentiment, but the statement.
5. I could say - breakup song about moving on. meh.
6. Back to the Start - funny that this comes right after the breakup song. This is probably the most danceable on the album - more electronic/synth that isn't missed on other tracks but fits this one perfectly.
7.Never Gonna Happen - incorporates some russian folk sounds on the intro; this track is what everyone means when they say that someone is being "fake" - she sounds so sweet, but take a closer listen and she's verbally slapping him in the face.
8. Fuck You - George Bush. Hilarious.
9. Who'd have known - beginning of a relationship song, I kind of hate it because it suits my life perfectly right now.
10. Chinese - the part where suddenly all you and your hunny want to do is watch tv and eat chinese food, being domestic isn't all bad.
11.Him - about God and his role on Earth, and like every person ever she's not sure if she believes.
12. He wasn't there - I don't know if this is about an ex or daddy issues. I'm thinking the later, but I coudl be wrong.
Now, go listen to it!
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Porn and Top Chef
*Warning: If you are offended by pornography you probably shouldn't continue reading this post.
I am not particularly a fan of either, but Top Chef was the only thing worth occupying the silence of my dorm and my roommate and her non-boyfriend are sitting on her bed wide-eyed looking at porn.
The first time this happened was about a month ago and she had never seen porn of any kind before and was being exposed to the strangest kind. I saw my first Playboy (girls on girls) when my friend Marc was packing to leave for college. He was cleaning out and looking at everything before eventually throwing away the majority of his closet. He also had a collection of VHS tapes that he had recorded porn on when his parents weren't home. The magazine didn't particularly do anything for me, I mean I'm not into girls and I know what girls look like and if anything I was kind of put off by how artificial their bodies looked.
This is not what my roommate is looking at. Tonight they are watching bestiality, well sort of. They were watching girls let dogs lick them and giving horses hand-jobs. Not my cup of tea. Before it was mostly transexuals and puffies.
One can only wonder what they're into when I'm not around.
I am not particularly a fan of either, but Top Chef was the only thing worth occupying the silence of my dorm and my roommate and her non-boyfriend are sitting on her bed wide-eyed looking at porn.
The first time this happened was about a month ago and she had never seen porn of any kind before and was being exposed to the strangest kind. I saw my first Playboy (girls on girls) when my friend Marc was packing to leave for college. He was cleaning out and looking at everything before eventually throwing away the majority of his closet. He also had a collection of VHS tapes that he had recorded porn on when his parents weren't home. The magazine didn't particularly do anything for me, I mean I'm not into girls and I know what girls look like and if anything I was kind of put off by how artificial their bodies looked.
This is not what my roommate is looking at. Tonight they are watching bestiality, well sort of. They were watching girls let dogs lick them and giving horses hand-jobs. Not my cup of tea. Before it was mostly transexuals and puffies.
One can only wonder what they're into when I'm not around.
Golf Balls don't belong back there
I have been getting headaches everyday for the past week or so around 4 PM. Yesterday I woke up and my tonsils were swollen. As the day progressed they got bigger and in the middle of Psychology I started to get chills. Awesome. I had a fever. By the time I had returned to my dorm I could hardly deal with standing or sitting upright, but I had to stay awake long enough to watch Scrubs. And I did, sort of. I stayed awake through the first episode, but started to doze during the second. I was out by ten fifteen, that never happens, but I suppose Nyquil helped.
When I woke up this morning I made an appointment at the student clinic. The nurse practitioner thought that I should have my tonsils out. Every nurse that I have ever met has said that.
My tonsils and the majority of the glands in my neck/throat are enlarged. I don't know for sure but I think that is has something to with my being born with the umbilical cord wrapped around my neck. When I was little I used to get strep all the time and when I was four my tonsils swelled to the point of sealing my throat completely. This happened on a visit to North Carolina while we were visiting the Rollinger's - my Godparents. Luckily they lived close to a hospital and Theresa (Mrs. Rollinger) drove me and my mom. I remember waking up and not being able to breathe and my mom not having any idea what to do, but I was awake and was able to communicate that I needed help. We drove with the windows down; the cool air seemed to help. When we arrived I was whisked into a room and hooked up to a couple of machines. I remember having to take off my clothes, except for my day-of-the-week underwear. The doctor was a man and I was embarrassed. After a few hours of wearing a rubber mask and breathing in what looked like smoke, I was allowed to go and kept my mask as a souviner.
This happened again when I was eight. This time I had to hold this tube in my mouth and they ended up giving me and inhaler, unsure of whether or not I had asthma or bronchitis.
Over the years I have had strep throat too many times to count and in the past year I've gotten sinusitis/tonsilitis five times. It took the third time to get the correct diagnosis. I usually have symptoms of one thing, but then they'll see my tonsils and lose it.
I have asked about getting my tonsils out, but we have Tri-Care Prime (military insurance) and they refuse to prescribe "unneccessary surguries." This would typically be appreciated, but I do believe that this is long over due. They should have removed them after they closed my throat the first time. I just haven't been able to convince a doctor to give me referal to get them out. Of course most of these doctors are not military, but contractors and that's an entirely different rant that I'll save for a later time.
I did however, convince the nurse practitioner to prescribe me augmentin instead of omoxicillin which means that once I get it filled I should be better within a day or two, until then I'll sleep and sleep and sleep some more.
When I woke up this morning I made an appointment at the student clinic. The nurse practitioner thought that I should have my tonsils out. Every nurse that I have ever met has said that.
My tonsils and the majority of the glands in my neck/throat are enlarged. I don't know for sure but I think that is has something to with my being born with the umbilical cord wrapped around my neck. When I was little I used to get strep all the time and when I was four my tonsils swelled to the point of sealing my throat completely. This happened on a visit to North Carolina while we were visiting the Rollinger's - my Godparents. Luckily they lived close to a hospital and Theresa (Mrs. Rollinger) drove me and my mom. I remember waking up and not being able to breathe and my mom not having any idea what to do, but I was awake and was able to communicate that I needed help. We drove with the windows down; the cool air seemed to help. When we arrived I was whisked into a room and hooked up to a couple of machines. I remember having to take off my clothes, except for my day-of-the-week underwear. The doctor was a man and I was embarrassed. After a few hours of wearing a rubber mask and breathing in what looked like smoke, I was allowed to go and kept my mask as a souviner.
This happened again when I was eight. This time I had to hold this tube in my mouth and they ended up giving me and inhaler, unsure of whether or not I had asthma or bronchitis.
Over the years I have had strep throat too many times to count and in the past year I've gotten sinusitis/tonsilitis five times. It took the third time to get the correct diagnosis. I usually have symptoms of one thing, but then they'll see my tonsils and lose it.
I have asked about getting my tonsils out, but we have Tri-Care Prime (military insurance) and they refuse to prescribe "unneccessary surguries." This would typically be appreciated, but I do believe that this is long over due. They should have removed them after they closed my throat the first time. I just haven't been able to convince a doctor to give me referal to get them out. Of course most of these doctors are not military, but contractors and that's an entirely different rant that I'll save for a later time.
I did however, convince the nurse practitioner to prescribe me augmentin instead of omoxicillin which means that once I get it filled I should be better within a day or two, until then I'll sleep and sleep and sleep some more.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Oh, Deary!
Oh, GEEZ! I haven't written in over two months! And if you know me (and presumably, you do) then you know that I am busybusybusybizzybuzzbuzzbuzzbuzz... I've been meaning to, I just haven't gotten around to it, because I know that once I start I won't be able to come back to it, I'll want to start over, and because of this writing blogs takes me forever. So, I try not write them unless I know that I don't have to be anywhere for a couple of hours, this is very rare.
So, let me give you the abridged version of my life for the past two months:
- I had a wonderful Thanksgiving and after tiring of my family was able to spend the remainder of it with my friend Couch as it was his birthday and I had made him a cake and a pie. I am an excellent baker.
-I had exams. I passed. That is all.
-I went to Sugar Mountain in Boone, North Carolina for Christmas with my family. It was relatively drama free.
--On the way there I almost hit a deer, it was huge, and when I stopped the lady behind me hit the back of the family mini-van. Everyone was fine, including the deer who just starred at me for a bit before running back into the woods.
- I was not born to "shread" - this was manifested in my inability to stand up on a snowboard for more than five seconds.
- I went to New York City for four days the week of New Year's. I will do it better next time. I did make a new friend though, he is Russian and thinks I'm silly. He is correct.
-I have been to a lot of shows and have been a part of dramadramadrama. I'll probably won't write about a certain encounter more than this right here because the last time I wrote about one 239842739 people read it (Hi, everyone!)
- As a result, I'm attempting to avoid it. I'm even being nice-ish, you all know how I feel about nice people (they are so boring) so I'm going more for the, "oh, she's fun!" girl.
-My love life has gotten more complicated, and up until this past weekend, I was hoping for something more than what it is, but I realized that it's just fine after all I'm nineteen, and I don't need a boyfriend.
-I got yelled at in the metro.
-Right after that I found an iPhone.
- I met an amazing woman at the Inauguration, she claims I "saved her life" (I will blog about the inauguration, I promise).
- I wrote a story. It will get published. And you will read it. And if you have anything to do with me and DC, you will read and go, "OMG,really?"
- My grades were crap last semester so I'm on "academic warning" (pre-academic probation) so I've been trying this thing called studying, I've always heard about it, but busied myself with other things.
-I've started going to the library, and I like it. I'm there right now.
-I have to blog for one of my classes everyday, so I may be posting multiple times over the next few days to attempt to make up for it. Some of them will have prompts, I'll tell you and you can skip those. I thought about creating a seperate blog, but I already have a ton of things to keep track of and it wasn't worth it.
- I am going to be famous by the time I am twenty-two, or at least published in something worth reading and/or have a TV show on Bravo or Style, etc. I'm writing the pilot now. And I don't know if you've heard this, but it's my theme song of 2009. Joel is going to be my personal photographer and replace Annie Lebowitz as resident at Vanity Fair when I take over there.
So, let me give you the abridged version of my life for the past two months:
- I had a wonderful Thanksgiving and after tiring of my family was able to spend the remainder of it with my friend Couch as it was his birthday and I had made him a cake and a pie. I am an excellent baker.
-I had exams. I passed. That is all.
-I went to Sugar Mountain in Boone, North Carolina for Christmas with my family. It was relatively drama free.
--On the way there I almost hit a deer, it was huge, and when I stopped the lady behind me hit the back of the family mini-van. Everyone was fine, including the deer who just starred at me for a bit before running back into the woods.
- I was not born to "shread" - this was manifested in my inability to stand up on a snowboard for more than five seconds.
- I went to New York City for four days the week of New Year's. I will do it better next time. I did make a new friend though, he is Russian and thinks I'm silly. He is correct.
-I have been to a lot of shows and have been a part of dramadramadrama. I'll probably won't write about a certain encounter more than this right here because the last time I wrote about one 239842739 people read it (Hi, everyone!)
- As a result, I'm attempting to avoid it. I'm even being nice-ish, you all know how I feel about nice people (they are so boring) so I'm going more for the, "oh, she's fun!" girl.
-My love life has gotten more complicated, and up until this past weekend, I was hoping for something more than what it is, but I realized that it's just fine after all I'm nineteen, and I don't need a boyfriend.
-I got yelled at in the metro.
-Right after that I found an iPhone.
- I met an amazing woman at the Inauguration, she claims I "saved her life" (I will blog about the inauguration, I promise).
- I wrote a story. It will get published. And you will read it. And if you have anything to do with me and DC, you will read and go, "OMG,really?"
- My grades were crap last semester so I'm on "academic warning" (pre-academic probation) so I've been trying this thing called studying, I've always heard about it, but busied myself with other things.
-I've started going to the library, and I like it. I'm there right now.
-I have to blog for one of my classes everyday, so I may be posting multiple times over the next few days to attempt to make up for it. Some of them will have prompts, I'll tell you and you can skip those. I thought about creating a seperate blog, but I already have a ton of things to keep track of and it wasn't worth it.
- I am going to be famous by the time I am twenty-two, or at least published in something worth reading and/or have a TV show on Bravo or Style, etc. I'm writing the pilot now. And I don't know if you've heard this, but it's my theme song of 2009. Joel is going to be my personal photographer and replace Annie Lebowitz as resident at Vanity Fair when I take over there.
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